Stress on Childhood development

We'll call 2014 the year of chaos and grief for my family. I have always heard that things come in threes from my elders. I could not have been prepared to cope with the stress an imbalance that year brought. We lost my oldest daughters dad to a deadly disease, my grandfather of natural causes and then my mom to a drunk driver in 2 1/2 months of each other. My mom was planning a huge party for my granny the exact same week she lost her life. I went from helping my mother wrap things up from my grandfather funeral just 6 days prior and helping her with last minute arrangements for my granny to planning my mom's home going service.

 I was so focused on helping my oldest daughter work through her grief of losing her dad and my mom whom was her absolute best friend that I neglected to pick up on the youngest daughter internalizing grief. It took all I had to not have a mental breakdown myself which actually evolved into depression but I will only share how it affected my youngest daughter to avoid writing a novel.

 Alondra  my youngest daughter was 9 years old due to turn 10 at the end of the year. She was observing all the loss and grief around her and really not reacting to it or so we thought. It was the small things that we did not see happening with her. She was not eating, she never wanted to go anywhere or be around anyone she would just sit and read or lay around as if she were tired. The affects of loss for my oldest daughter had affected my youngest daughter. My oldest cried so much she would make herself sick. We got her in to talk to someone and we allowed her to process every stage of grief. But these were not things that my youngest daughter Alondra was a witness to nor did it cross our minds that anything was having an effect on her until her little mind took a pause to ask "WHY". 

Alondra wanted to know WHY our loved ones had to die and WHY her granny could not just come home. After attempting to explain the process of death to her being mindful that she had never lost anyone it then began to dawn on me that I had been so busy with one child that I neglected another during her time of grief. I honestly never saw the signs mainly because I never saw a reaction when everything was going on. That was definitely a lesson learned for me. Children cope with things in life that stress them differently, they may not react with emotion it could be a lack of emotion that is an indicator to a strain or tension within a child. Looking back there are so many things I would have done different to help my daughters during that time, I am grateful that chapter did not define either of my girls with a negative mindset about life their life.

Children all over the world have their way of coping with the stress of their daily lives. Children in Sierra Leone and Uganda experience tragedies ranging from separation, to violence and displacement the results of which can cause an impact on their cognitive ability and brain development. As per an article I read in TIME professionals allow children to express themselves or the trauma they experience through their own drawings. Like my daughter children may not be able to verbally express what they are going through right away however, a child drawings can convey to us what their minds are experiencing. If a child is enduring any level of stress for an extensive period of time it wears heavy on their ability to control their emotions.Toxic stress can cause a significant amount of long term damage to a child physical growth. The International Rescue Service or IRC believes that these effects in lack of development can be broken. The IRC works with young children and their families to form alternative paradigms with their environment playing a major role.The most pertinent factor is for children whom have been in a traumatic encounter is to have a consistent adult figure in their lives. 

How Children Suffering Trauma and Toxic Stress See the World. (n.d.). Retrieved September 28, 2019, from https://time.com/longform/toxic-stress-children-migrant-trauma/.

Breastfeeding :Why Breastfeed?

Every mom wants to learn as much as she can as well as do all the things that are beneficial for her baby, breastfeeding is one of those things. Breastfeeding is yet another way to create a strong bond between mother and child. Participating in the practice of breastfeeding enables  "Babies who are exclusively breast-fed are less often sick, partly because breast milk provides antibodies and decreases allergies and asthma" (Berger, 2016). It was important to me to try to provide that added protection for my daughters when I had them so I breastfeed for the first few months.

 I unfortunately was not able to nurse my last daughter for more than a month, which was a huge shock and disappointment to me. It never occurred to me that my supply would dry up, which was confusing because "quantity increases to meet the demand" (Berger,2016). My last daughter weighed 8 lbs. 4 oz at a little over 3 weeks early, she was surely demanding a lot however, my body decided it just was not up for the task.
In the United States, most new moms (about 80 percent) start breastfeeding. More than half (about 58 percent) of moms breastfeed for 6 months. About one-third of new moms (36 percent) breastfeed for 12 months (March of Dimes, 2019). I did not think that breastfeeding was something that is still practice as highly as it may have been a decade ago but the more I read I am learning that is not the case. Being able to breastfeed not only protects babies immune system but it is also a benefit in it for moms. After a women has a baby breastfeeding increases a hormone known as oxytocin. Oxytocin "helps the uterus go back to the size it was before becoming pregnant" (March of Dimes, 2019).

A report by the World Health Organization (WHO) and the United Nations Children's Fund (UNICEF) - shows that the lives of newborn babies under the age of six months could be saved if they were breastfed for at least the first six months of life.

During that period, mothers are strongly encouraged to feed their babies with nothing but breast milk alone, and in the preceding months they can then give their babies complimentary food but with continued breastfeeding up to two years.

Breastfeeding is very critical during the first six months of life as it helps in preventing diseases like diarrhea and pneumonia, the two major causes of death among infants. It is also beneficial to the mother as it reduces the chances of her getting ovarian and breast cancer (Welle, 2017).

Believe it or not, 99 percent of mothers in Norway initiate breastfeeding, according to LLLI, and 70 percent are still exclusively breastfed at three months. This is likely due to the generous maternity leave laws available to them. Save The Children reported that mothers can take up to 36 weeks off work with 100 percent of their pay, or they may opt to take off 46 weeks with 80 percent pay. Additionally, 80 percent of Norwegian hospitals are considered "baby friendly" meaning that they do not accept free infant formula or bottle-feeding equipment from private companies and have trained staff to help and encourage mothers to breastfeed at birth (Manes, 2016).

 There were a few other countries that had low breastfeeding rates that I was actually surprised by because I assumed that most other under developed countries only breastfeed their children and I could not have been more wrong.


Berger, K. S. (2016). The developing person through childhood (7th ed.). New York, NY: Worth Publishers.

What Is Breastfeeding Like In Other Countries? A Look At 6 Places Around The World

https://www.romper.com/p/what-is-breastfeeding-like-in-other-countries-a-look-at-6-places-around-the-world-18338

Many African Countries Urged To Support Breastfeeding Mothers: Dw: 07.08.2017

Deutsche Welle - https://www.dw.com/en/many-african-countries-urged-to-support-breastfeeding-mothers/a-39966423

Breastfeeding Is Best

https://www.marchofdimes.org/baby/breastfeeding-is-best.aspx